NC500 - Day 1
Updated: Jun 1, 2018
London to Luton to Buxton (206 Miles)
Despite being excited to be going on another road trip, in hope of finding the ever elusive beach, I felt sad at leaving my boy Furley for a month. I didn't want to wake up but Mummy said he was coming to the park with me for our last London walk until October. This made me run around with a proper Doodle Dash and making myself look pretty so he wouldn't get any lustful ideas with the other girls, in my absence.
After our walk, and a long goodbye, we packed our bags and loaded up the little Mini Clubman that always bulges at the welding points when Mummy takes us away. I don't know how she squeezes it all into Betty, but somehow we got everything in, including my balls and bandanas. Before long, we were on the road, with every tick and midge repellent in a safe place so Mummy knew where to find them. She's been having nightmares in the week building up to our travels; in her mind we are going into the I'm a Celebrity jungle, deep in the depths of Australia ... not the Scottish Highlands. Her imagination has run amuck and so far, we have both be plunged into the depths of spotty midge poxes and swarms of tick infestations. Even I've been itching more at the thoughts in Mummy's head; I'm sure she has pseudo bites in the middle of the night as I can feel her scratching in her sleep. Do they do flea treatment for humans because I think she has Munchausen by Tick Proxy. I've been thinking about taking her to the vet, like she did me, to see if they can give her something; if I've got to have a tablet shoved down my throat then I think it's only fair that she should too!
After a couple of hours driving to Luton, we finally met Bertie the Bandit. I gave him a good old sniff before passing approval, and then ran off around the big depot to sniff all the other vans; I even did a small wee in the corner when no-one was looking because it was boring listening to how Bertie worked. I'm the star attention in Mummy's life but all her attention was on Bertie. I have to say though, he's quite handsome, and Mummy likes him better than Bertha the Beast.
With Bertie all packed up, we had to take a long drive to somewhere called the Peak District. Apparently it holds a lot of nostalgic memories for Mummy as her childhood was spent in Bakewell scoffing their pies and drinking Dandelion & Burdock. No one knows this but when she drinks that stuff she does a lot of burping. If I burp she laughs and tells me I'm beautiful ... I don't find hers quite as endearing for some reason. The Peak District had lots of fields that made me sit up from my sleep. I could smell them, or the cows in them at least. It smelt all yummy, full of good things for me to sniff and eat. I wasn't allowed to get to them though as Mummy kept driving, so I flopped back down, fed up that Bertie was still the focus of the day. I have to say though, Mummy wasn't swearing as much this time - I'm too young for her language. Our campsite was lovely and even had a doggy exercise area so I ran off into it immediately and saw off the giant black and white monster at the end of the field that kept mooing at me. It just stood and stared, chewing on something as if to say, you're next. I didn't like it one bit and went flat onto the ground to show it I could manoeuvre quicker and more stealth like than it ever could. Mummy explained to me that steak came from cows so I contemplated becoming a lioness on a hunt because I like steak and was hungry, but then a bird swooped down and pecked it on its head, so I ran off in the other direction - I'm not big enough to tackle both a cow AND a bird.
We didn't stay in the Peaks very long; just enough to have a sleep and make Bertie a little more comfy. We were so tired that we slept under clothes and tins of baked beans that were strewn across the bed as Mummy tried to squeeze the contents of our home into the smallest spaces I have seen so far.
When I curled into her arms, under all the (clean) pants and Heinz tins scattered across the bed, Mummy promised we would find a beach this trip, so I snuggled down and stuck my tongue up her nose to say thank you. Even with all the tiredness, I swear she still spent the night scratching in her sleep though.